I can't lie. I haven't actually had the time to traverse the blogosphere...so I haven't been there 'in spirit' either... and woah dudes... thanks for punishing me for it! My traffic is still solid thanks to my extra-blogicular activities but my fellow blogger traffic has taken a nosedive.
Okay. I get it, I get it! Quid pro quo. As you sow, so shall you get comments... I understand. I know I'm a rotten blogger. And you can say it all you want, that "it's okay, do what you want, blog how you want"... truth is, that's a lie. Blogging is defined by a strict set of rules and it's just another form of a club. Members must abide by the rules. And Blogging Rule #2 is Thou Shalt Reciprocate and Participate.
I'm a bit Groucho Marxist when it comes to rules, cliques and clubs. Sometimes to my detriment. I don't want to rebel against the status quo particularly if the quorum is made up of people I like and respect. But it happens. I know I sound selfish and in some ways, quelle horreur!...lazy but I assure you, selfish and lazy are not words one can attribute to me.
Anyway, I probably won't change my thoughts on this but I will, as soon as I can, leave comments on blogs I regularly read. I haven't been able to blog because I'm terrifically busy and I state that not as an excuse nor to make me exempt and not out of any delusional self-notion that I'm 'special' (because I KNOW, we are all busy. And special.) but because I am genuinely busy. I'm not complaining! I've added photographer to my CV and that takes a great amount of my time.
Also... I had promised in my last post to discuss the whole botox/cosmetic surgery thing... now's not the time but I will say this... I am too vain to ever get cosmetic surgery. I will explain. In another post.
...and yes I know that my diatribe reeks of hypocrisy because regular readers know I have a love/hate relationship with receiving comments. I truly believe that the comment system has created a monster. Reciprocal Obligation. Like we don't have enough. I loathe the idea that someone comments on my blog out of obligation. Or with a sense of expectation. I don't read a book or watch a movie with the expectation that the author and director are going to thank me for doing so.
I so very much appreciate the bloggers who do take the time to leave comments regardless of my lack of reciprocity and no doubt this post will piss many fellow bloggers off, I will have to live with that... I know you're thinking "who the hell do you think you are? Why should you expect to receive anything if you don't give?" Well I think I'm me and I'm good at what I do... and it's simple... I don't give expecting to receive. So naturally I believe in that being reciprocal.
4 comments:
I cannot speak for the whole blogging community but I can say this for myself that I after a lot of tussle with myself i have finally reached a point after 1.5 years where I comment, if I have time or I have something to say, or if i simply feel like it ... I do not care for reciprocation, obligation or offending someone. There is always so much going on in our non-virtual lives that there is really no time to worry about imaginary problems.
Moving on ... I admire you for the number of talents you have ... and how passionately you pursue them all ... I wish I have good at half things you excel in ... one of my goals for 2012 is to take up some form of dancing. I thoroughly enjoy seeing it and really have to be good at at least one form. You inspire me! :D
♡ from © tanvii.com
Oh the drama of commenting! What gets me more is the content of comments and some peoples motives. Like the "follow me and I'll follow you back" comment I get so often. Well if you wanna follow me then that's great. But it's kinda rude to be like I'll follow you only if you follow me! Seriously 1st grade! Or the people that leave two words. "Nice shoes." "Great dress." And you never see them again. It baffles the mind. My point is, I'm allowing my creativity to flow and that's the point of my blog. Part two is I get to connect and meet fabulous people thru comments.(Like you!) And it seems like 50% are just trying to get a number of followers which is a huge turnoff. I dunno, I guess it's like expecting phony or boring dull people to change just because they are part of the blog community! Do I make any sense? lol. Happy wknd! xo -Taj
I don't think that comments are the only way to 'reciprocate.' If a blogger doesn't acknowledge my existence (doesn't reply to emails, tweets, fb comments, etc.), I feel she thinks she is too good/cool/popular to communicate with her readers, so I don't bother to comment. Why should I take the time to comment/tweet/ when she doesn't care about her readers? Commenting on a blog DOES take a long time. Responding to a tweet doesn't. I don't always stop visiting, but I do stop making my presence known.
You however are a different case! I don't feel you are 'disconnected' from your readers - being a genuine person and feeling bad about not reciprocating and well, just being you (okay, I'm biased :P) ... your loyal readers will forgive you for anything. ;)
Oh! Even if you were "busy" enough not to be able to drop in on my blog, I'll always drop in a few words here to let you know that I'm still there for you! :)
And I'm sure you'll "reciprocate" with your sweet words of encouragement & enthusiasm as soon as you have some time on your hands.....I mean, we always do understand & respect each others' need to take time out for our professional & personal lives.....& that's why it doesn't matter whether we are visiting each other regularly, or after long gaps of time - we easily pick up where we left off last time..... :))
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